Inspired by a conversation in which the position was held that if Stanley Raymond Kowalski were going to adopt a nickname based on his first name, it would not, in fact, be Stan.

Cesca eyed the man who would go undercover as her brother nervously. He had spiky blue hair and was cracking gum between his teeth--he didn't even look like a cop. "What's your name?" she asked him, and he grinned. The pale-green gum stuck out between his eyeteeth.

"Stosh," he said. "Stosh Kowalski."

"What kind of name is Stosh?" Cesca had been many places in her travels, but she'd never met anyone named "Stosh" before. She tried to think--when she'd worked as a simultaneous translator for the U.N., had anyone there been named "Stosh?" Certainly no one when she'd met when she was with the World Health Organization. She frowned.

"Polish," he said, and blew a bubble.

She raised her eyebrows. "If you don't mind my asking, why did they pick you to be my brother?" She flicked her eyes over his ripped jeans and worn-out t-shirt--Mother of God, he had a nipple ring poking through--

He snickered. "Because I am the finest undercover man ever. I am the non-suckiest undercover man you ever saw."

Cesca rolled her eyes. "I doubt it," she said. "I can't wait to hear what Tony thinks of you."

* * *

When she let him into her apartment two days later, she had to admit that he did clean up well. He'd dyed his hair black and combed it down, and he was wearing, if not Armani, at least a decent pair of pants and a button-down shirt. Stosh whistled appreciatively at her collection of fine crystal, most of which she'd brought home from trips to Prague.

"I invited Tony to dinner," she said. "I thought it would be easier on him to meet you here."

"Yeah, whatever," he said, and she rolled her eyes again. No matter how he dressed, the man had no class. Bad enough that she had to put up with Tony's eccentricities, but to have her brother's place taken by this intolerable man--!

The bell rang, and she answered the door. "Hey," Tony said, as his wolf bounded past her, through the living room, and into her bedroom. (She suspected that the wolf stole panties from her laundry hamper and gave them to Tony, but she'd never been able to prove that.) Tony looked over her shoulder at Stosh. "Who're you, buddy?"

Cesca gritted her teeth and looked at the floor.

"The new Ray," said Stosh, "but you can call me Stan."

--

The End.